Summertime Blues Playlist

RND/ To pause and reconsider the Rock N’ Roll adage that “There ain’t no cure for the Summertime blues.” A playlist and commentary.

And everything depends upon
How near you stand to me
– Morrissey*

*Update: no it doesn’t.

Curse Summer and everything to do with it. It was too fucking hot this year; borderline unendurable. Oven hot air with zero movement. Stuck in a shitty, overpriced rented shoebox at night with gnats buzzing round one’s violent-idiot head. Sticky, tacky legs. Empty hours upon hours, staring at the ceiling, feeling nothing but uselessly horny and hopelessly frustrated. Without direction. An aggressive Summertime nothingness – a dull, hard baked blankness, reminding you of all those days alone when young. So long ago it’s just Dead. Sitting on the dusty kerb of that Terminally Boring housing estate, staring at red brick suburbia and baking slate rooftops which didn’t end. Summertime and existential depression always go sweaty hand in hand.

The single most important message of this awful season of heat and sorrow: leave. Do not say goodbye or weep inside like some dipshit clown, simply depart and don’t look back. Gently but firmly shut the front door behind you, switch all Life Support fans to full blast and get back to your [/‘Big Science’] Projects. Or whatever. To leave immediately upon arriving is good, but to never have left seems infinitely better.

Golden Hour at Minnis Bay by Alan Glicksman
Golden Hour at Minnis Bay by Alan Glicksman (via Flickr)

Playlist of ‘Sad Summer Songs’

In which you were after certain songs that somehow evoke Summer’s heavy, slow, sad, unrequited blues. (There’s more than a few obvious ones in here, but stick with it.)

  • Higgs Boson Blues – Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
  • Sad Memory – Buffalo Springfield
  • In The Summertime – Bob Dylan
  • Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want – The Smiths
  • Bend to the Road – Calexico
  • Cruel Highway – The Texas Toad Lickers
  • April Come She Will – Simon & Garfunkel
  • Urge for Going – Joni Mitchell
  • Merciful – Nils Petter Molvaer
  • Générique – Miles Davis
  • September – David Sylvian
  • Ghost Of Love – David Lynch
  • Paris, Texas – Ry Cooder
  • Sleep Walk – Santo & Johnny
  • The Warmth Of The Sun – The Beach Boys
  • Indian Summer – Friedemann
  • Dear Mr. Fantasy – Traffic
  • Eyes Of A Stranger – Payola$
  • Wave of Mutilation – Pixies
  • Summer Kisses, Winter Tears – Julee Cruise
  • Summer’s Almost Gone – The Doors
  • White Sands – Patrick O’Hearn
  • Who Knows Where The Time Goes – Fairport Convention
  • Wicked Game – Chris Isaak
  • The Boys of Summer – Don Henley
  • Almost Cut My Hair – Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young
  • Can’t Find My Way Home – Blind Faith
  • Dead Flowers – Townes Van Zandt
  • I’m On Fire – Bruce Springsteen

Example Reference Links

UPDATE PATCH (AUTUMN)

To consider important general life advice – for example:

“Never catch the contextless tail end of a conversation upon awakening with a sore neck in the early morning Autumn sunshine, moderate high winds whipping up the leaves of unrequited Summer memory; in which some smug greaseball just outside your window is painfully-obviously trying to get into the underwear of an amazingly cute, young intelligent creature you were once enamored with in another lifetime – his smooth varnished liar’s tongue dripping with obsequious, unctuous complements.”
– Resident Internet Theorist / Professional Asshole Robert What

In which the darkly laughable overheard conversation fragment in question was (or at least seemed to be) “I love your artistic representation.”

‘I love your artistic representation’? Fuck right off with that, Sunshine Boy – before I march out there and unceremoniously rabbit-punch you in the neck, Dennis Leary style. Tosser. A desolate widescreen virtual painting of such a foul smelling, buttery complement. From an photo by Oleander Garden: 3440 x 1440

“I love your artistic representation”

Ideal / Idealized cost for such a Concept as this: £10k – contact Robert What today for details.

// how to play big science

Boring Social Media themed study

RND/ Social media themed art study, based around terminally dull media:

Amazon Reviewer

1728 × 10422 .jpg

Amazon Reviewer

To imagine a weirdo Amazon reviewer and their bizarre product list.

An Unremarkable Image

Seemingly simply no more or less than precisely that.

3195 × 1851 .jpg

An Unremarkable Image

Example Artistic Statement via Theorist Robert What:

Straight from the hideousness of mundane everyday existence: an unremarkable image via semi undecidedly non professionals.

Bland juxtapositions half set against a drab modern palette: tools of the postmodern hyper war, digital typography architectural shadows and rendering glitches – the unstated ideology however being that such images are somehow ‘no more or less than they appear’, ie. wholly unremarkable – when in fact they might simply be far less even than that.

False promises and deep time; all that does not glitter still might not be golden.

Crayzay Rich Brats Online

Via some foul young Instagram munt.

3072 × 3072 .jpg

Crayzay Rich Brats Online

Consider ‘Get Money’ art – via some kickable rich brat on Instagram.

Example Artist Statement via Theorist Robert What:

Every day as exactly the same; punching the life clock until death – except how to recognize any difference?

An endless mechanical process of filling up hollow days with deluded illusion that something-anything is happening.

– In which I want to be stinking filthy rich; my life seems extraordinarily ordinary, terminally boring and unbearably lonely.

At least with some dirty money in my sweaty, greasy palm I can pay to work with some actual, real artists and together create something of some minor Meaning, vague beauty and-or temporary intellectual engagement.

All I need is one breakthrough – one chance, one foot in the door.

Only thing is, the world is already Theirs, baby – these strutting credit cards with legs.

Given chance I could change reality itselves.

With some serious money I could reinvent myself; become famous, admired, a cool person I’ve secretly dreamed about for years.

With unlimited resources, with cultural position and friends I can live a new life of ease, fun and high adventure – finally escape this pathetically dreary null space, a half-life still as yet un-lived.

– At least at university [1] there was lite beer, shit dope and beautiful intelligent young people.

Best of all perhaps was staying up late to discuss Life, Polyverses and Everything.

The Internets are now all there is now for me – an undead virtual substitute.

I visit the same kind of sites daily – pretending to feel remotely interested in stuff.

Pretending to write for and on some random anonymous backwater art blog nobody reads or remotely cares about.

It’s all a bit of a cosmically useless farce without a punchline and only a listless audience of one.

Going through the daily motions of having emotions.

– All I need; some immensely wealthy patron or benefactor – some group of equally forward thinking, intensely artistically inclined visionaries to pretend to take me seriously long enough to adequately fund an artistic lifestyle to which I could so easily become accustomed – free instant access to artists, thinkers, supercomputing social networks.

– In other words, a brought ability to treat information as global capital flow – to plunge sticky clever fingers into the digital matrix and directly interface with mass global culture at speed of collective artistic thought.

– In some small way I might already be doing that right now -‘hyper advanced postmodern theory-fiction’ evolving consciousness realtime (kinda.)

– I just want someone – anyone – to think I’m ‘really on to something’ – whose clever enough to ask questions.

Nobody around here ever asks me any questions; my intense sadness over not feeling needed or admired for strange thoughts in and channeled via this brain makes my silent sadness an existentially weighty burden I could do without.

– Note: a couple of £ doesn’t buy a lot nowadays; I’d probably just spend most of it on sophisticated shameless self advertising and promotion for even more serious startup capital, in order to perform some truly hardcore ‘Big Science’ RND.

*mild listless, uselessly wistful sigh*

Does The Sky Exist

3072 × 6937 .jpg

Does The Sky Exist

Wow, good question.

EDT: Existential Depression Test

3072 × 1728 .jpg

EDT (Existential Depression Test) Results

To consider existential depression test results.

Social Media Message Wall

2854 × 3240 .jpg

Social Media Message Wall

A modern media collage.

Your Answer To Solving Media

3072 × 2407 .jpg

Your Answer To Solving Media

In which your answer to solving modern media.. sounds like Double Dutch.

Ideal / Idealized Cost for such Conceptual Work: £20K each – contact Robert What today for details.

Reference Link

  1. Tales Of English University Life

// how to play big science