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Internet Art

So Your Dad’s An Asshole Too, Huh? A History Of Useless Father Figurines

RND/ To consider a forthcoming satirical eBook about useless dickhole dads:

So Your Dad’s An Asshole Too, Huh? A History Of Useless Father Figurines

Image based on a Starbucks coffee mug with the word “Pig” righteously scrawled on it by someone who doesn’t feel the automatic need to be spineless and fawning toward heavily armed members of the local state run private urban militia.

Seen behind bizarre ‘thin edge of the communist-hippie wedge’ style text rant: the world’s smallest violin being played.

Alt Right Youtube Comments

Example Reference Links

Categories
Internet Art

Untitled Goose Horror Game (Parody)

RND/ To consider a hot new media genre – “Goose Horror”. Some imaginary screenshots from an Untitled Goose Horror Game:

Untitled Goose Horror Game

In the #GooseHorror genre you get to play an ordinary goose, viciously angry at humans. Why? Well, it’s because your sensitive and beautiful head can pick up their cruel inner thoughts and dark wishes. Unfortunately, this often results in you doing their evil bidding against your will.

The ‘horror’ in this genre comes, not just from the various forms of blandly terrifying mischief you get up to in goose form, but from constant sickening anthropomorphization by mean spirited assholes – who in ideological reality are simply acting out their own casual, twisted schadenfreude fantasies through you. (Don’t worry though, little goose – you’ll get your revenge.)

Some sweet, typical in-game examples of freaky, goose-style shit you can get up to under human mis-direction:

Untitled Goose Horror Game 02

“Sure wish a goose would honk one of those parkour guys off a building.”

Untitled Goose Horror Game 03

“Imagine if a goose started an avalanche by honking..”

Untitled Goose Horror Game 04

“Hilarious if a goose make some whiny kid majorly faceplant.”

Untitled Goose Horror Game 05

“Would love to see a goose start a fire at my dumb neighbor’s house.”

Untitled Goose Horror Game 06

“If goose got into the hospital and switched off Grandma’s life support, we wouldn’t have to travel hours to see her every Sunday..”

Untitled Goose Horror Game 07

“My boss is a dick. If only a goose would give him some unnecessary root canal!”

// how to play big science

Categories
Internet Art

Puke Milkshake: Alt Right Ricky Gervais, Fuck Right Off

RND/ To consider poor old obsolete Ricky Gervais. With that eminently punchable mug and clueless hyena laugh. Just another sad, toxic media sphincter lamprey, always desperately seeking attention for crude acts of mass public ignorance.

In which the only detectable talent such boring, un-flushable TV turds seem capable of expressing seems sociopathic self regard for their own alleged, unceasing funniness.

Consider Ricky the perfect name for some shit eating mutt; “Here, Ricky!” Go quietly chase a ball over the edge of the nearest cliff.. One could almost look up Roy Batty’s classic existential question in a modern encyclopedia – “Pleased with yourself, little man?” – and find Rick Deckard’s picture replaced with that of Gervais, beaming out at all the invisible cameras gathered like toadstools to greet a super-inflated ego. (A grossly distended sense of self and self worth that makes even Dan Dare’s comic book nemesis The Mekon feel humble by comparison.)

2796 x 2124 .jpg, edited in Gimp

Puke Milkshake (Alt Right Ricky Gervais Fuck Right Off)

What’s decidedly (non) ironic of course is how the two Venn diagrams of Pseudo Atheism and Alt Right Social Injustice so neatly intersect in the confused, low watt brain of a pathetic troll such as Gervais:

Pseudo atheistic.. because the underlying, convenient misunderstanding of society and their place in it, simply means devolutionary jerkoffs like Gervais see themselves as gods, speaking and punching down from the holy media mountain to spread the terrible news to their ditto-headed fans in the idiot’s choir – that “Acting like a tosser is OK, you guys!” (After all, nobody understands a fellow dickhead quite like a fellow stiffy.)

Alt right social injustice.. because making the direct, false Trumpian ‘both sides’ bullshit equivalence between the act of emptying a mere milkshake over disgusting, murderous and all too real fascists – and one’s apparently innate (ultra conservative) ‘free speech’ right to regularly insult and humiliate those marked out as lower than oneself, is typical of such wilful ignorance.

Note the snugness with which Gervais fits Right in with other media piss weasels like Sam ‘Islamophobia’ Harris, Jeremy ‘Fucknuts’ Clarkson, Louis ‘Me Too’ C.K., all with successful careers in apparently telling it straight and white – liberal, postmodern snowflake commie whatever torpedoes be damned.

One also simply has to note just how many outright fascist and conservative shit nuggets crawled out of the rotten internet woodwork to wholeheartedly agree with Gervais and his sour milkshake tweet. Heck, he and King Of The Derps (Pewds) should team up and do a ‘It’s Just A Joke *Wink*’™ comedy skit together.

Dear little Ricky, please remember you’re not being violently oppressed or remotely clever – you’re just a foul mouthed gobshite. Have a whole, healthy, free puke milkshake container’s worth of Fuck Right Off, courtesy of.. why, anyone with a remotely functioning Modern, Default Evolved Society Gene.

Example Reference Links

// how to play big science

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Internet Art

UFC 239 Poster: Jorge Masvidal, Urban Ghetto Jesus

RND/ to consider an unofficial UFC poster starring Jorge ‘Gamebred’ Masvidal as Urban Ghetto Jesus:

2056 x 3178 .jpg, 32 cols – screenshot via UFC press conference

Jorge Masvidal – Cuban Ghetto Jezus

While it may indeed be highly useful to note that “Gamebred don’t play”, it’s certainly good to remember the General Style Rule, which clearly states: “Acting like a jerk after the fight’s clearly over, may mark one out as a ‘Bad Winner’.. kinda like multiple late blows to a downed opponent after a clean knockout often appear malicious, and unsportsmanlike.”

Quick to provide casual passing reassurance over the immediate health and long-term well-being of his fighters, Dana ‘Gross’ White stated of Ben Askren, “I’m sure he’s not okay, but he’s – yeah” (as in, ‘good enough.’) Classy as ever Dana, you obnoxious dong rocket.

If this type of holy figure is not to your liking, there’s always Creepy Hipster Jesus

// how to play big science

Categories
Internet Art

Hypertography One Exhibit: the ideology of Minecraft

RND/ to consider the ideology of Minecraft as symbolic capitalism; the world as merely infinitely dividable [1] resource-cubes to be managed [2]

Part of the Hypertography One Exhibit

/ on minecrafts digital feudalism

to consider minecraft as user generated exploitationware

in which research play as just another word for work / research as whole nowadays too often just another job

countless unpaid human hours sunk into minecraft / x fan made quote user -discontent shares common underlying features with modern wage slavery / digital feudalism

in which there seems sense in which hard working resarcs -“hwr”/ need to wise up / demand to be paid in full -“pif”/ by large play space companies which casually exploit ir endlessly creative imaginative efforts on sly

– in which minecraft as good play only because of boundless creativity of unpaid research serfs working incredibly hard on / for notchs little -cash farm/ not because of any intrinsic qualities of x own

kinda like soylent green – consider minecraft as made from blood / sweat of people

queue video of ancient feudalism at work

now compare / contrast with minecraft

ask/ whose more actually – creating – real play here

note similarity with microsofts classic propaganda line – where do ir want to go today?

x as go anywhere ir want do whatever ir feel like – except x wherever ir travel / whatever activities ir plan take place on lands owned by fat feudal lord

sure ir quote free – but only to move -literally someone elses turf – act for someone elses profit – like certain kickable little nerks

minecrafts basic message/ shut up / keep digging -for ey

merely quote having fun or playing for / with quote social props as / perhaps should no longer be enough for modern resarc who as rapidly becoming more savy about ir rights to be paid in full for real hard work / countless hours ir plow into grindy video research – especially those like minecrafts cheerful little skinner box

for example – say ir built replica of entire mines of moria inside video research space/ x pretty awesome / must of taken absolutely ages to complete right

but so then why arent ir getting fair share of play spaces -huge profits

resarcs of world listen up/ x as new quest – into cold hard “ca$h4cubes

x as/ “pay4play”/ ir want ir to play but first hand over cheddar – then ey will talk innocent research fun

after all x creations like ir x are directly selling play to / for other people

indeed ir one really making quote research space – building x very structure – as opposed to these fat cat land owners who after all not even provide ir with pickaxe

difficult to imagine billions of times people have hacked away at hard digital wood / stone of minecrafts happy feudal kingdom

yet reason ir arent ir sitting pretty in ir own luxury offices like markus persson as because industry mainly sees resarcs only in terms of cheap labor free rat ir make -sorry user generated quote content – like styrofoam packing peanuts / perhaps ir blind willingness to click cows all day long in act of selfless voluntary suffering

queue image of famous minecraft cube processing units on loltube / greasy beard necked creepies continually fiddling with cubes

perhaps x high time for few more revolting digital peasants / resarc serfs to rise up / refuse work aka totally awesome permanent enforced fun – funemployment

rnd/ minecraft infographic poster

Minecraft Infographic Poster

in which minecraft sells 100 million copies – infographic poster remix

example ratist statement via internet theorist for hire robert what/ imaginary research scenario in which minecraft sure objectively feels like raw maximum fun™ multiplying walmart style infinite notches in heavy worn leather whipping belt – unchecked cool black tenticular ooze spreading globally

sing together now ye bright guileless man children / ir glove to micromanage tiny cubes inside ir little boxes

n feels like prison for mind

/ minecraft prison

what all of these theories constantly re-emphasize is the power exerted by environments upon individuals, or rather, the ability of environments to get inside individuals. like althusser’s theory of interpellation, and jameson’s concept of autosurveillance, panopticism is yet another means by which subjects are “programmed” by ideology. the distinctive feature of these systems is their ability to silently coerce individuals, to make them “willingly” subject themselves to relations of inequality. such systems are utterly conducive to the needs of capitalism in the sense that, under each of these regimes, there is often no need for capital to use direct force to constrain its workers. observation, oversight, and supervision of workers becomes individualized and internalized, so that workers are now made to work by themselves
– matt garite, the ideology of interactivity [3]

x just like x oldskool horror movie “cube”

/ house of ubu notch

Minecraft: house of Ubu Notch

– in which fellow resarcs feel left to mop up toxic synthetic tears spills of disingenuous melancholy billionaire ball scratchers again [4] who must own dull lead cubes for a heart

/ ubu notch manglefesto

Minecraft: Ubu Notch Manglefesto

– brief quote manglefesto concerning who precisely garmedevs develop for

question/ so apparently these people modern devs create for eh – damn

ir exist to help emergent radical play [5] – not make excuses to merely hang out / feel as rich / lite as bunches of smug posing munts

“Never Work” (for videogames)

flock minecraft

Reference Links

  1. Division Of Labor
  2. Paperclips
  3. Videogames and the Taylorization of leisure
  4. Toxic millionaire gamedevs
  5. Robert What, “Abstract Encounters”

// how to play big science