Example ‘About’ Template Page For Your Site

RND/ An example ‘about’ template page for your website. Just change the name to fit:


Fascinating, rambling, deranged
Reddit review

A mix between performance and architectural critique, this is in-game photography documentation at its best. It also indicates a possible way for critics, artists and game developers to engage in a fruitful collaboration.
– Matteo Bittanti, Gamescenes

Also, this guy who hates Andy [Warhol] has a clever interesting website (robertwhat dot com) the 20th Century salutes him.
– MONDO 2000 @2000_mondo

What: To consider a internet performance or digital LARP (live action roleplay) of Philosophy, Literature and Art; an ongoing project for 20+ years.

Who (IRL): A skint, random working class UK based somebody.

Internet Theorist Bob What

Rob’s Mission: “A stylistic zeitgeist response.” An intense artistic escape attempt from daily mundane existence.

Lockdown Art: Socially isolated art in a time of intense global crisis.

Big Science: A ‘strange imaginary game you pretend to play’. Set in the dark, neon tinged ‘Near Future Retro 80s’ hyperreality of late stage Videogame Capitalism aka Ludocapitalism.

Typical in-Scene usage:

Researcher Y: Hi – what are you doing?
Researcher X: Oh, you know – “Big Science.”
Researcher Y: blinks OK.. How do you play?
Researcher X: Good question! Let’s find out..

Guidebook: Nonlinear, postmodern Theory-Fiction fragments for an imaginary game; an experimental European Cyberpunk sci fi novel. Pre-Alpha version available.

How To Play Big Science

Your Role: You are a fellow brilliant, troubled Research Scientist, also recently hired by a mythical, Near Future hypercorporation to work on ‘advanced R&D projects’ with biocosmic scale implications.

This Site: A showcase of Rob’s own worldbuilding / playthrough; bricolage, remixes and mashups of digital pop culture artifacts found Online. These images and texts represent his experiences and discoveries within The Game. So how do you play B.S? Our Player Orientation Video will hopefully set the tone, and provide a flavor of what’s at stake:


Robert’s Plan: To save a loved one (and himself) from the soul crushing monotony of Work, break free of Student Debt, buy a well insulated house, fully develop and express “Big Science” and help other Scientists – eventually forming a Cool Alternative Artist Syndicate (collective) where they can play in an atmosphere of intellectual and artistic freedom and interdisciplinary exchange, without interruption and in a supportive environment.

Meanwhile however Robert must unfortunately Earn A Living™. This fact is treated as inseparable from his daily, political Digital Labor Practice or ‘Art (as) Work’. This is difficult, since he dislikes the Capitalist ideology of Patreon.

Site Notes: Before Namecheap screwed up, this site was called Alien Fiction. Everything here is entirely free as in Freedom: “Zero Copyright, No License, Maximum R&D” – please Kopimi! – and exists for the purposes of philosophical critique, sociopolitical commentary and satire. Site previously in lowercase to engage with notions of Polish and Professionalism.


Rob’s Artistic Approach: To consider that Art too often seems laborious and impoverishing; years of fruitless accumulative effort to develop small-potatoes ideas, whose more imperfect Conceptual exposition is possible far quicker. Even better still – to simply pretend that such advanced ‘R&D Projects’ already exist – ie. to simulate them – and then to offer resumes, outlines, commentaries. More non-reasonable, more effortless, it feels preferable to scrawl strange digital graffiti in the margins of bizarre virtual worlds.

How To Purchase Rob’s Art: Some theoretical context for purchasing Art (/in the time of Covid + Anthropogenic Climate Change) from this site:

  • All art on this site is of the ‘Luxury Automated Conceptual Psychedelic Space-Communist Lockdown’ variety.
  • The very notion of ‘Robert What’ as a living artist is on offer for a grand total of $8B; compared to the strict, standard contemporary values of the inherently scammy Global Capitalist Art Market, Robert’s own art-performance-whatever brand feels reasonably priced.
  • Such Art only contains at least ‘1 calorie art’; its successes and failures lie in the precise moment (manifest privilege) of Purchase and default (Consumerist) excess.
  • To purchase such Art, is to enter into a conceptually performative call-and-response with Resident Internet Theorist Robert What. Works on this site stating ‘Ideal / Idealized cost for such a concept: [AMOUNT] – contact Robert What today for details‘ are available to purchase instantly. After verification of transaction, Robert can then provide a digital certificate of Conceptual purchase.


Hiring: If you’ve unique Projects which could benefit from Outsider consultation, freelance speculative ideas brainstormer ‘Robert What’ brings keen, non-rational / experimental philosophical investigation and a deep left-field perspective to reveal and expand existing / hidden Meaning and untapped potential Artistry. His skills include the ability to undertake daring cognitive leaps between concepts and perceptions; such tests and imprecise deployed notions involve indeterminate strategies – unpredictable ongoing developments and impossible events to deconstruct and ponder alternative outcomes – thus providing fresh insights into emergent ‘in-Scene’ play.

Contact Details: To chat about cool project collaboration and-or consultation, reach out today at bob at robertwhat dot com. Please expect up to three working days for replies.

Om Mani Padme Hum.

// how to play big science